Those of us who live in the southeastern part of the United States are watching with keen interest the path of Florence, a massive storm which has its bulls-eye zeroed in on the coast. It is not certain as of this writing exactly where it will make land-fall, but unless things change drastically within the next few days it will hit somewhere within the cone of uncertainty which extends from northern Florida to northern Virginia.

Life is filled with storms: hurricanes, tornados, floods, all ranging in intensity and duration. Some pass by with little concern while others cause even the most stout-hearted among us to cringe in fear and worry. Sometimes the fear and worry are warranted as those storms ravage the land, leaving a path of destruction in their wake. At other times the storms pass with just a whisper, and all the fear proved to be unsubstantiated.

As Florence approaches, we are hearing warnings, telling us to make preparations. We are encouraged to download our state’s hurricane preparation guide, which contains crucial information in how to make preparations for this, or any future, impending storm. We are to make sure we have all the necessities – bottled water, flashlights with fresh batteries, generators, enough food in the pantry to last several days, perhaps even a couple of weeks. We are encouraged to prepare for the worst while hoping for the best.

This is all good advice, to be sure. Life is filled with uncertainties and storms. Not necessarily storms of nature, but storms of life. Sometimes these storms can be seen coming from a distance, and we have time to prepare. Other times, they come like an unexpected tornado in the middle of the night, with no forewarning whatsoever. We are all of a sudden awakened by the sound of the howling wind, the hail beating on the window panes, and the heart-wrenching explosions of thunder.

Regardless of which form the storm takes, they still have the ability to render us helpless for a period of time. Some, like hurricane Katrina which struck the gulf region of the United States in 2005, are so devastating that even years after the storm the damage is still being dealt with. Others come and go leaving very little damage, and can be overcome easily in a matter of days, or perhaps a few weeks.

This is the reality of life. We all face storms of different magnitude and intensity as we travel through the years. Some are major set-backs which leave us reeling in the aftermath, wondering if we can survive, and if we do, how long it will take for the wounds to heal. Others are minor storms which come and go leaving little evidence that they ever even happened.

So, what can we do to be ready for the storm? Just as we are being warned right now of the dangers of Florence, and what preparations we need to make to be ready, what preparations can we make to prepare us for the storms of life?

I will strive to answer that by sharing my personal commitment to help engaged couples prepare for the uncertainties of life as they prepare for marriage. In pre-marital counseling, I talk about quite a number of different issues, but for the sake of this blog I will focus on just a few.

First, the couple needs to know that life does not always go the way we plan. When asking for them to share with me expectations for the future, I suggest that they think about where they want to be one year into their marriage, then five years, and then ten years. I ask them to tell me about educational goals, career goals, personal goals, family goals. Then, after listening to their responses, I begin the ‘what if’ questions. I want them to realize that the best thought-out plans are sometimes unrealized. Life happens. Things change. Some of those life happenings can be devastating.

I don’t share these things to try to persuade them that marriage is not worth the risk, but to hopefully get them to understand that marriage is full of risks. Storms will come. If we have not thought through some of the ‘what ifs’ then we can easily be destroyed. We can start playing the blame game, accusing our spouse of causing all the problems. “If you would…” “If you could…” “If you hadn’t…” We can turn a blind eye to our part of the problem.

Second, the couple needs to know that even though life happens, and plans have to be changed, it does not mean that the relationship is damaged beyond repair. This is a crucial time for growth and progress. It is not a time to throw in the towel and walk away, but a time to reevaluate, to talk together and discuss the situation. Look for the root cause of the storm, not just surface issues. Granted, this is hard work. We want to find the surface issue, and put a band-aid on it, while not really dealing with what is underneath. This could actually be a bit painful, but it is well worth it in the end.

Think of it in terms of surgery. You may find a spot on your skin, and think nothing of it. But, a friend of yours, who happens to be a trained physician, looks at it and is concerned about what lies underneath that spot. After going to a specialist, you are told that there is a cancerous growth underneath that spot, not visible to the eye. If left alone, it will eventually cause excruciating pain, and eventual death. But, all you see is a painless little spot. Surgery, you are told, will get rid of the problem and you will be cancer free. The surgery will be extensive, and the recuperation will be very painful and discomforting, but it will be well worth it in the end.

So it is with storms in life. Sometimes they will be very painful to deal with, but in the end it will be worth it to go through the process of ‘surgery’ and healing.

And third, and most important, is the fact that God is the ultimate answer to all the problems in life. He is the only One who can enable us to clean up after the storm. He can put all the pieces back together. He can give us peace in the midst of the storm, and then give us victory after the storm. But, we have to be willing to allow Him to do this. Sometimes the storm causes us to take our eyes off of Him. We allow the storm to become the focus, and we lose sight of the fact that God sits enthroned above the storm, unaffected by the storm, able to control the storm, and ready to give victory after the storm.

So, the best preparation for the impending storm is to know that it is coming, and that we are safe in the arms of the only One who can master the storm, and even bring a brighter day after the storm passes than we ever experienced before the storm came. So, whatever your storm happens to be today, or whatever storm you will face in the future, don’t allow the storm to cause you to lose sight of Him. Keep your eyes focused above the storm, and allow Him to show you the path through the storm.