When reading through the New Testament, we don’t have to read very far into the Gospels – Matthew, Mark, Luke and John – before we come across some extremely difficult statements made by the Lord. When we come to one of these it is easy to stop and think to ourselves: Did Jesus really mean that?

There are actually quite a few of these difficult statements. In my next few blogs, we will give consideration to several of those statements with the desire to come to an understanding of what Jesus meant when He made some of these hard-to-understand assertions.

“If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple.”

Luke 14:26

This must certainly have been a shock to the people who heard Jesus make this assertion, and to all others who have read it as recorded in Scripture. We are commanded in the Bible to love one another. We are even to love our enemies and do good to them, returning good for evil. We are commanded to honor our fathers and mothers, and to love others as we love ourselves. The Bible teaches that we are to be known for our love for one another.

And yet here, Jesus tells us that we cannot be HIs disciple unless we hate our fathers and mothers, our wives and children, our brothers and sisters, and even our very lives! How are we to understand what appears to be a clear contradiction? How is it possible to hate and love at the same time?

Perhaps the best way to understand this difficult saying of Jesus is to think of His usage of the word “hate” in relative terms. It is not that we are to hate others in the literal sense of the word because the Bible forbids, even condemns, that kind of hatred. So we are not to think of this statement as a command to literally hate.

What we are to understand from this statement is the seriousness of being a sincere disciple of the Lord. In essence, Jesus is saying that our love for Him should be so great that it would appear that we “hate” everyone else. Jesus always comes first! We cannot put anyone or any other relationship before our relationship with Him.

My wife and I have discussed this topic on several occasions in the past. I love Teresa deeply, and that love has grown through the years. I love spending time with her, going places with her, taking a quiet walk with her: in short, living life with her. Paul commands husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the church and gave Himself for her. In our discussions we have assured each other of our deep, abiding love.

But in our discussions on this topic, we acknowledge that our love for Jesus must be our first priority in life. He must come first, before our commitment to and our relationship with each other and anyone else.

So this statement of Jesus must be understood in the sense of comparison. When I compare my love for Teresa, or for anyone else, with my love for Jesus Christ, it should be crystal clear that my love for Jesus exceeds my love for all others. This is the type of disciple whose life will bear testimony to his/her relationship with the Lord. He will be the center of all they do. It will be obvious to everyone they meet that Jesus Christ is, indeed, Lord of their lives.

May it be so with all who read these words!